For some reason, herelately my fantasies are starting to feel like my reality.
I just feel like whatever I dream, I can get it. Whatever I want, I could have it. Whatever I want to change, I can change it. Knowing that God will be behind me as long as I keep on the right track, I just…I feel like I could do anything.
Things that I need to worry about don’t concern me like it used to, I just….I feel new. Like I need to be NEW.
Things shook up last year, but maybe I need to keep on shaking things up. Maybe I need to keep brainstorming new ideas of what I wanna do, where I wanna go, what I wanna be, and what I wanna have. What kinda happiness I’m seeking, whatever it is that I’m looking for.
The only thing that hasn’t come my way yet is Love, but hey, it’s whatever, right?
Now I want to go to Boracay, Phillipines. It’s the most beautiful beach I’ve EVER seen, I want to go there. Every year I just keep talking up new ideas and going for it. I think, that the day I said that I would stop wishing and just go for it was the best thing I could’ve ever told myself.
Just DO it. (Nike was on that! lol)
I think what I really want to start doing is traveling and it’s just been on my heart. Things, a lot of things are just starting to seem possible. I’m clear on the highway, nobody’s in front of me and I’m just cruising along, this is what it feels like. It feels….good. It feels good.
I’m still anxious. The thought of leaving the state gives me straight anxiety no doubt, but it’s starting to feel like good anxiety. I don’t know how to explain it.
It’s like, I don’t want to be down anymore. I don’t want to be down and depressed, I want avenues and ways to always be able to get out. I don’t wanna get down and stay down anymore for I know what it’s like.
The people around me (even the ones I can’t STAND) are giving me ideas on ways to get out and stay out. Like Anonyman, he’s a persistent business man trying to make his own business which is where the idea for me to start selling handmade goods came from. It’s just alot of things.
Alot of things.
I feel like I know where I want to be, at least the path I want to be on anyways…
I just feel like I’ll get there…. And that I’ll be okay.